By Halima Layeni |
I have heard women express how much they despise men a couple of times. Recently, at a high level event, I heard an acclaimed feminist say men’s rights should never be upheld because of the history of abuse meted on women and girls.
I acknowledge and sympathize with all women and girls who have been victims of abuse and oppression. Absolutely no one deserves to be subjected to any form of fear and violence. I myself have been a victim of abuse and I know first hand what it means to experience pain and trauma. I also know for certain that these women only speak from a place of brokenness and oppression which is completely understandable.
I however strongly believe that suppressing men’s rights while only upholding women’s rights will take us back to ground zero real quick. We should all strive for a world that is free from fear and violence for all and not just for women and girls. Boys and men are equally humans with feelings and they must always have their rights protected at all times.
Everyday, many innocent men continue to pay for crimes they didn’t commit because of lack of adequate help and support from society. Young Nigerian, Izu Mmadubueze committed suicide after being falsely accused of rape by a jilted lover. Gregory Counts was in prison for 26 years for being falsely accused of rape. Johnny Depp lost a $22.5 million deal after being accused of domestic violence before he was even declared guilty by the court of law. The list is endless.
If we must achieve an equal world for all, then we MUST equally uphold the rights of all men and that includes ensuring all boys and men equally gain access to adequate medical, psychosocial and legal support.
Men who have suffered sexual, emotional and physical abuse deserve access to adequate help and support. Men who have been neglected and abandoned deserve love and compassion. Men who have been traumatized deserve healing. Male survivors also deserve to be seen, heard and believed. Men deserve to have their story told without being judged or mocked. Rape victims equally deserve justice and a chance at life to heal.
There is so much we can achieve in the world today if we just attend to men’s emotional and physiological wellbeing. More than 80% of the global crisis we face will be eradicated if we help men heal. International Men’s day is around the corner and I don’t see a line up of events to educate, celebrate and empower men.
We need to do better.
Halima Layeni
Men’s Mental Health Advocate
Founder, Life After Abuse Foundation
